Would this make more sense in alphabetical order?

I tried that actually, but some of them play off each other, and only make sense for one to follow the other. Keeper | 76 | Disclaimer 19:16, 28 May 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Also, I removed the signatures. Or should they all get them? Or none? I prefer none. Keeper | 76 | Disclaimer 19:20, 28 May 2008 (UTC)[reply]

I prefer none, but thought Dekeppai (or however it's spelt) might object to my removing his. — iridescent 19:22, 28 May 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Well, we'll just hafta block Dekkapai then, won't we?  :-) Keeper | 76 | Disclaimer 19:26, 28 May 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Dekkappai laughs nervously but politely as he backs away from two armed Admins... Dekkappai (talk) 18:54, 30 May 2008 (UTC)[reply]

For the record, I'm absolutely crying at my desk right now, these are cracking me up in their truthiness...Iridescent, yours particularly rock. Keeper | 76 | Disclaimer 19:44, 28 May 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Casliber sorted the list, but now there are several unsorted entries, starting at Cool Down Blocks. Not sure if they're intentionally unsorted? dorftrottel (talk) 16:02, 31 May 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Not intentional as far as I'm concerned, I'd prefer alphabetical order. --Malleus Fatuorum (talk) 17:35, 31 May 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Ok, I've sorted it again. I also created a navigation box (instead of the vertical TOC) and level 3 headers for each letter. dorftrottel (talk) 17:54, 31 May 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Nice work there. Reading it now. Enigma ^message 17:39, 2 June 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Please feel free to make any additions. --Malleus Fatuorum (talk) 17:40, 2 June 2008 (UTC)[reply]

I don't understand the punative one. That's obviously not a word. Is that an inside joke? Enigma ^message 18:41, 2 June 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Yes - so many people misspell punitive as punative, and thus... Nousernamesleft^{copper, not wood} 21:51, 4 June 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Heh, I had to look it up to be sure myself...Keeper | 76 | Disclaimer 21:57, 4 June 2008 (UTC)[reply]

• bureaucrat/red tape is...interesting.
• Disruptive editing that Keeper added reminds me of this. Editing an article someone else edited in the past can also be classified as stalking. Enigma ^message 20:10, 2 June 2008 (UTC)[reply]

A place to send an article created by an editor that you don't like.

so so true of late. So sad, but so true. Thanks for the chuckles. _{TravellingCari}^{the Busy Bee} 20:13, 3 June 2008 (UTC)[reply]

OK, I've read the Brigg railway station article and seen the rusty iron bridge pic; now I'm so depressed I've lost the desire to live!

It is served by three passenger trains (in each direction) on Saturdays only between Sheffield and Cleethorpes.

Whoopee, three trains in each direction no less, I can hardly contain my excitement! I imagine the "Kid in Africa" would think all his Christmases had come at once if the bridge was given a coat of paint and an extra train was put on every other Sunday. Ah well, off to write my will now, giving Iridescent a special mention. Cheers. --Red Sunset 21:39, 4 June 2008 (UTC)[reply]

News bulletin:

Although the National Rail Enquiries' station facilities site states that the station is closed Monday–Sunday (sic. – which means it's permanently closed!), you will all be relieved to know that despite there not being a nearby bus service, taxi rank, car or cycle hire facility, the car park is open 24 hours a day Monday–Friday. Therefore, should you find yourself in the unfortunate position of needing to catch a train on the only day that they pass through Brigg, namely Saturday, you will find the car park closed! You couldn't make this stuff up! --Red Sunset 22:41, 4 June 2008 (UTC)[reply]

I know Iridiscent won't mind me saying this (I wouldn't say it otherwise, as he's an armed admin), but he is the uncrowned king of boring articles, of that there can be no doubt. Take a look at what he himself considers to be his crowning achievement, the A215 road. :-) --Malleus Fatuorum (talk) 21:59, 4 June 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Thanks, I'll certainly do that, but I think I've had as much excitement as I can stand for one day so I'll steel myself for it tomorrow. I have to confess that I actually contributed to Mud and Shed, and very nearly to Skip (Oh the shame of it!) --Red Sunset 22:41, 4 June 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Might want to see if you can to a little CE on Wet floor sign while you're at it, RS. Dekkappai (talk) 22:45, 4 June 2008 (UTC)[reply]

You couldn't make it up. :lol: How on earth did you come across that? --Malleus Fatuorum (talk) 22:48, 4 June 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Through a highly contentious AfD, Malleus... The original article was what I thought a very funny hoax. "It is believed that wet-floor signs were first used (albeit with far less beauty and style) at the dawn of the Floor Age. As soon as floors were introduced in Roman times, it is likely that they began getting wet–whether caused by water, vomit, urine, or any other liquid. It was only a matter of time before it was understood that a sign would prevent a pedestrian from slipping on the wet floor..." "Because the Germanic tribes to the North had not yet developed floors, they had little use for a sign that would declare a floor's wet state..." "...it has often been argued that the wet-floor sign was introduced to much of the world through the expansion of the British Empire from the 17th to the 20th Centuries. It is assumed that the wet-floor sign first reached the Americas on HMS Horatio Nelson Commodore in 1673." etc., etc., Dekkappai (talk) 23:07, 4 June 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Actually, I prefer that version to the current one. --Malleus Fatuorum (talk) 23:11, 4 June 2008 (UTC)[reply]

That's priceless! I've just got to look at that article too. Thank-you both so much for brightening my day! --Red Sunset 23:18, 4 June 2008 (UTC)[reply]

←Malleus, please - A215 road at least has some interesting facts on it. My personal champions at the moment are Pate Hole and The Mall Wood Green (which I very nearly managed to slip through the GA hoop, too). If anyone wants to join Risker and my long-term ambition to get Hypnodog onto the main page, do feel free. — iridescent 00:19, 5 June 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Incidentally, all you people who are deriding Brigg railway station for only having three trains a week need to have a look at Manchester's greatest contributions to the rail network, Reddish South railway station and Denton railway station - served by a mighty one train a week in one direction only, which a week later comes back the other way, and the mighty Watford West railway station ("temporarily closed for repairs" since 1996). — iridescent 00:19, 5 June 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Everyone's second-favourite BADSITE now includes a link here; expect some of the more dubious characters from Wikipedia's history to start "improving" this page.

Malleus, just to remind you that, while it can't be done until the page has been subject to "vandalism or disruption", a user page can be indefinitely semi-protected at the request of the page's owner... — iridescent 23:07, 5 June 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Fame – at least of a sort – at last! Obviously I'll be watching the page, it's my baby, but rather than wait for me to request semi-protection let me instead give any administrator the authority to semi-protect the page whenever they feel it necessary to do so. It was, after all, meant to be a bit of fun, not a stick to beat wikipedia with. --Malleus Fatuorum (talk) 23:32, 5 June 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Fantastic, Malleus (& other contributors), I've spent half the evening chuckling at these. It's the closest thing to an 'insider's guide' I've seen yet ;) EyeSerene^talk 20:13, 6 June 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Agreed; this is a wonderful collection of "truthinesses" (if that's the correct word), and it just gets better each time you look at it. I haven't laughed so much in a long time. --Red Sunset 20:46, 6 June 2008 (UTC)[reply]

RSunset, I've enjoyed your additions, and agreed, I haven't laughed so much at the good in-jokes, fatalism, pessimism, et al, in ages. I keep coming back because every so often, someone thinks of something genius to add to the intra-wikipedia. Malleus should get barnstars for this. Wait, do we have an entry on barnstars?....Keeper | 76 | Disclaimer 20:48, 6 June 2008 (UTC)[reply]

All of you have done a great job, and special thanks to MF for hosting this and beginning it. I love this page. The mix of witty, sardonic, elegiac, and utterly savage definitions is a joy to read. I look forward to seeing what new things have appeared when I'm back from wikibreak in a few days. Cheers all, Antandrus (talk) 20:51, 6 June 2008 (UTC)[reply]

So can I count on your support at the inevitable MfD? --Malleus Fatuorum (talk) 21:04, 6 June 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Well, you can certainly count on mine - I bellowed with laughter at the office today. My colleagues were bemused to say the least Fritzpoll (talk) 21:05, 6 June 2008 (UTC)[reply]

ILIKEIT EyeSerene^talk 21:31, 6 June 2008 (UTC)[reply]

		The Destroyer of the Wiki Barnstar
		Is hereby granted to Malleus for his sterling efforts. And for his battle against the scourge that is the em-dash. Apparently. — iridescent 21:02, 6 June 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Why don't we have an entry on em-dashes? Worried about the edit war that would follow are you? Keep in mind, Irid, you are the only one with block buttons...see admininstrator..... Keeper | 76 | Disclaimer 21:05, 6 June 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Spaced em-dashes are the scourge of wikipedia, and a mortal sin. If my efforts have in any way helped even one editor to avoid eternal damnation then I am satisfied. --Malleus Fatuorum (talk) 21:11, 6 June 2008 (UTC)[reply]

For anyone wanting an illustration of the respect in which I hold the WP:MOS, I direct you to Talk:Broadwater Farm — about as close as Wikipedia gets to badger-baiting outside of an RFA. (Malleus, I put that em-dash in just for you — and may I remind you that editing another user's talk page comments is a blockable offence?) — iridescent 21:47, 6 June 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Whoa, backing away slowly from an armed admin. --Malleus Fatuorum (talk) 21:53, 6 June 2008 (UTC)[reply]

My bad, I thought this was a serious encyclopedia page run by FAC reviewers. Am I going to be sent to ArbCom by administrators now? giggy _(:O) 10:27, 7 June 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Can anyone think of what whoever uploaded this image was actually trying to illustrate? I can't imagine we ever had an article on How to answer the telephone whilst tied up with a tow-rope and wearing a very unflattering bikini. Huge bonus points, barnstars, whatever you want to anyone who manages to work this image into a genuine article. — iridescent 21:54, 6 June 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Phone bondage, Bondage by phone, Telling mom about how fun it is to be tied up, Ordering pizza under duress....all red links? Damn. Just checking...Keeper | 76 | Disclaimer 21:57, 6 June 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Hogtie bondage certainly has some of Commons's more – er – "specialised" efforts... — iridescent 22:00, 6 June 2008 (UTC)[reply]

It's tempting, but... damn my conscience. EyeSerene^talk 22:03, 6 June 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Mummy, make it go away!!!!! — iridescent 22:12, 6 June 2008 (UTC)[reply]

It doesn't work for me. Before the sniggers start, I mean the clip. It just crashed my browser. EyeSerene^talk 22:27, 6 June 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Your sanity protection filter is obviously working, then. (That "play" button reminds me of one of those Skinner experiments we used to run back when I was studying game theory, with a "push this button and lose all your winnings" sign – they pushed it almost every time.) — iridescent 22:30, 6 June 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Yup - to paraphrase someone or other, the last sound we'll hear before the entire universe folds itself up like one of those collapsing tents is "What does this button do?" EyeSerene^talk 22:38, 6 June 2008 (UTC)[reply]

I think this thread sums the mentality up better than anything I say ever could. — iridescent 22:42, 6 June 2008 (UTC)[reply]

...! EyeSerene^talk 09:30, 7 June 2008 (UTC)[reply]

(yes this is a joke) — iridescent 22:16, 6 June 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Image caption: "Are you sure this is the only way to get a signal?" --Red Sunset 22:57, 6 June 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Brilliant! --Malleus Fatuorum (talk) 23:32, 6 June 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Further captions:

• Angela felt that the instructions she got with her new Nokia could have been clearer!
• "Hello ... yes, I'd like to complain about your company's double-glazing sales techniques!"
• It was at this point Angela decided that the aptitude test for the call-centre job was a bit extreme!
• "I'm afraid that'll be extra Mr.Wales!"

--Red Sunset 07:21, 7 June 2008 (UTC)[reply]

• "Sorry, I'll have to call you back. I'm a bit tied up at the moment." (I'll get me coat...) EyeSerene^talk 09:30, 7 June 2008 (UTC)[reply]